DOUBTING THOMAS
Once upon a time a man couldn't find his axe. He suspected his neighbor's son because the boy walked like a thief, looked like a thief, and spoke like a thief. The following morning the man found his axe when he remembered where he left it. The next time he saw his neighbor's son, the boy walked, looked, and spoke like any other child.
This ancient tale by Lao-tzu portrays in five acts the cause and resolution of all conflicts or differences of opinions and false assumptions—whether in a family, between neighbors, friends, or among nations.
Act one: an external change occurs.
Act two: we become unhappy about the change, and we quickly find someone or something to blame.
Act three: our unhappiness colors our perceptions and we misidentify "the enemy."
Act four: the external cause of our unhappiness is removed.
Act five: our perception clears up and we see things as they simply are. Unfortunately, very few people get to the fifth act.
Once we have identified "the enemy", the ego builds a formidable rationalization process to ensure that we always feel that way towards that person or event.
Why is it so hard to admit we were wrong, or to apologize to someone? Because we have invested so much energy in building our self-righteous facade, and the ego will do virtually anything to maintain consistency to keep us away from the Truth—that only God is real, everything else is but His dream.
Therefore the main trick of the ego is to give the illusion of permanency to the transient phenomena of nature. As the saying goes, "If you tell a lie enough times, it becomes accepted as truth, and, the bigger the lie, the more likely it is to be accepted."