கடைசி வரை அவனுக்கு "சா" வே வரலை...

குப்புசாமி குப்புசாமின்னு ஒருத்தன்....

ஒரு நாள் அவன் கடவுளை நோக்கி தவம் இருந்தான்..தவம்ன்னா சாதாரண தவம் இல்லை..
பயங்கரமான தவம்...

அவனோட தொடர்தவத்தால் மேலே கடவுள் இருக்கிற இடம் பூரா வெப்பத்தால
கொதிக்க ஆரம்பிச்சிட்டுது...இனிமேல் பொறுத்தால் ஆகாதுன்னு தெரிஞ்சி நேரா
தவம் செஞ்சிகிட்டிருக்கிற குப்புசாமிக்கிட்ட வந்துட்டார்..

குப்புசாமிக்கு சந்தோசம் தாங்க முடியல..

கடவுள் கேட்டார்....என்னப்பா உனக்கு குறை..?

இவன் சொன்னான்..சாமீ...உங்க ஆசிர்வாதத்தில எனக்கு எந்த குறையும் இல்லை..
இந்த சந்தோஷமான வாழ்க்கையை விட்டு போக எனக்கு விருப்பம் இல்லை..
ஆகவே...எனக்கு சாவே வரக்கூடாது..ன்னு கேட்டான்..

கடவுள்,எவ்வளவோ சொல்லிப்பார்த்தார்...அவன் விடுறதா இல்லை...
வேற வழி இல்லாமல் அவன் கேட்ட வரத்தை கொடுத்துவிட்டு போயிட்டார்..

நாட்கள் வேகமாக நகர்ந்தன...ஒரு நாள்....

தன்னோட பையன பள்ளிக்கூடத்திலே சேர்க்கப் போயிருந்தான்...தலைமையாசிரியர்
பையனோட அப்பா பேரு என்னன்னு கேட்டார்...

இவன் சொன்னான்..

என்னோட பேரு குப்புமி ன்னு..

மறுபடி சொல்லிப்பார்த்தான்....

குப்புமி
குப்புமி
குப்புமி...ன்னு தான் வந்தது....

கடைசி வரை அவனுக்கு "சா" வே வரலை...

கதையில் இருந்து விளங்கும் நீதி:-
கலியுகத்தில கடவுளும் நக்கல் பண்ணுவாரு..
நாமதான் யோசிச்சு வரம் கேக்கணும்...

Customer is always right

Caller : Hi, our printer is not working.

Customer Service : What is wrong with it?

Caller : Mouse is jammed..

Customer Service : Mouse? Printers don't have a mouse you fool!


Caller : Mmmmm??.. Oh really ?... I will send a picture.




Moral: Customer is always right listen him thoroughly and believe what he is saying.

Ten Commandments of Marriage

Ten Commandments of Marriage

Commandment 1
Marriages are made in heaven. But so are thunder and lightning.


Commandment 2
If you want your wife to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say; talk in your sleep.


Commandment 3
Marriage is grand — and divorce is at least 100 grand!


Commandment 4
Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year,the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.


Commandment 5
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one
thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.


Commandment 6
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one.


Commandment 7
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish.


Commandment 8
Every man wants a wife who is beautiful, understanding, economical, and a good cook. But the law allows only one wife.


Commandment 9
Marriage and love are purely matter of chemistry. That is why wives treat husbands like toxic waste.


Commandment 10
A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished

Men and Women Equation

Equation 1

Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey = eat + sleep
Therefore:
Human = Donkey + Work + enjoy
Therefore:
Human-enjoy = Donkey + Work
In other words,
Human that don't know enjoy = Donkey that work.

Equation 2

Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkey = eat + sleep
Therefore:
Men = Donkey + earn money
Therefore:
Men-earn money = Donkey
In other words
Men who don't earn money = Donkey

Equation 3

Women= eat + sleep + spend
Donkey = eat + sleep
Therefore:
Women = Donkey + spend
Women - spend = Donkey
In other words,
Women who don't spend = Donkey

To Conclude:

From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Men who don't earn money = Women who don't spend
So Men earn money not to let women become donkey!
And women spend not to let men become donkey!
So, We have:
Men + Women = Donkey + earn money + Donkey + Spend money
Therefore from postulates 1 and 2, we can conclude
Men + Women = 2 Donkeys that live happily together!

THE GREAT AMERICAN RECESSION

THE GREAT AMERICAN RECESSION

It was the first day of a school in USA and a new Indian student named Chandrasekhar Subramanian entered the fourth grade.

The teacher said "Let us begin by reviewing some American History. Who said ‘Give me Liberty or give me Death’ ?"

She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrasekhar, who had his hand up: 'Patrick Henry, 1775' he said.

'Very good! Who said 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?''

Again, no response except from Chandrasekhar. 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863' said Chandrasekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrasekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.'

She heard a loud whisper: 'F**k the Indians.'

'Now,who said that?' she demanded. Chandrasekhar put his hand up. 'General Custer, 1862.'

At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.'

The teacher glares around and asks 'All right! Now, who said that?' Again, Chandrasekhar says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991.'

Now with almost mob hysteria, someone said 'You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.'

Chandrasekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, ' Michael Jackson (RIP) to the child witnesses testifying against him - 2004.'

The teacher fainted. And, as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, 'Oh shit, we're screwed!'

And Chandrasekhar said quietly, 'I think it was the American people, November 4th, 2008". (Recession)

Tax Structure in India.... Funny But True...

Tax Structure in India.... Funny But True...


Question 1.. : What are you doing?
Ans. : Business.
Tax : PAY PROFESSIONAL TAX!


Question 2 : What are you doing in Business?
Ans. : Selling the Goods.
Tax : PAY SALES TAX!!


Question 3 : From where are you getting Goods?
Ans. : From other State/Abroad
Tax : PAY CENTRAL SALES TAX, CUSTOM DUTY & OCTROI


Question 4 : What are you getting in Selling Goods?
Ans. : Profit.
Tax : PAY INCOME TAX!


Question 5: How do you distribute profit ?
Ans : By way of dividend
Tax : PAY DIVIDEND DISTRIBUTION TAX


Question 6 : Where you Manufacturing the Goods?
Ans. : Factory...
Tax : PAY EXCISE DUTY!


Question 7 : Do you have Office / Warehouse / Factory?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY MUNICIPAL & FIRE TAX!


Question 8 : Do you have Staff?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAFF PROFESSIONAL TAX!


Question 9 : Doing business in Millions?
Ans. : Yes -- Tax : PAY TURNOVER TAX!
Ans : No -- Tax : Then pay Minimum Alternate Tax


Question 10 : Are you taking out over 25,000 Cash from Bank?
Ans. : Yes, for Salary.
Tax : PAY CASH HANDLING TAX!


Question 11 : Where are you taking your client for Lunch & Dinner?
Ans. : Hotel
Tax : PAY FOOD & ENTERTAINMENT TAX!


Question 12 : Are you going Out of Station for Business?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY FRINGE BENEFIT TAX!


Question 13 : Have you taken or given any Service / (s)?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY SERVICE TAX!


Question 14 : How come you got such a Big Amount?
Ans.. : Gift on birthday.
Tax : PAY GIFT TAX!


Question 15.: Do you have any Wealth?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY WEALTH TAX!


Question 16 : To reduce Tension, for entertainment, where are you going?
Ans. : Cinema or Resort.
Tax : PAY ENTERTAINMENT TAX!


Question 17 : Have you purchased House?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY STAMP DUTY & REGISTRATION FEE !


Question 18 : How you Travel?
Ans. : Bus
Tax : PAY SURCHARGE!


Question 19.: Any Additional Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY EDUCATIONAL, ADDITIONAL EDUCATIONAL & SURCHARGE ON ALL THE CENTRAL GOVT.'s TAX !!!


Question 20: Delayed any time Paying Any Tax?
Ans. : Yes
Tax : PAY INTEREST & PENALTY!


21) INDIAN : Can I die now??
Ans :: Wait we are about to launch the funeral tax !