Men like good communication after sex, says a new survey conducted recently. "Really?" That's how women reacted when we told them about it. But it wasn't the opinion of the fairer sex that PT wanted to know. We wanted men to 'talk'... well not immediately after the 'act' but after we asked them this question: Do you like a good conversation after a session of love making? "I like to have one. It helps me connect with my partner," said Ralph Mendonca, who's had a couple of girlfriends in the last three months!
Like him, Paresh too spends a "few minutes" knowing what his woman felt like after being so "passionately loved". "I definitely like to know whether she liked the way I made love to her or not. I agree my conversation doesn't last for more than ten minutes as I drift off to sleep after that, but I do make it a point to talk to her," said Paresh, who's having a live-in relationship with his girlfriend of three years.
So does that mean men have changed now because earlier, studies proved that there's a scientific reason why men, when they climax, roll over and fall asleep. Oxytocin, which is linked to a pleasurable sense of relaxation, and prolactin, which is linked to sleep is released in a man's brain after an orgasm. Even the rush of blood after climax depletes the muscles of energy-producing glycogen in men which make them feel exhausted.
But now it seems like even these cocktail of drugs released in a man's brains is not going to let him keep his mouth shut. "It's true that I feel sleepy after the act but then I also know that it's probably the only time I get to talk to my wife. We both work the whole day so we talk and make the most of it when we are in bed," said Jignesh, who's been married for four years now.
Changes in a couple's work pattern, no doubt, has benefited the woman more but men too can see the good side of it - talking has helped them re-ignite the passion they had forgotten existed between their sheets. "I used to hear stories from my friends about how they would give a damn about their woman's needs and roll over and go off to sleep. I decided to not be like one of them. My wife loves all the pillow talk. She very animatedly tells me about the eventful day that she's had at work. I listen... it's a small price to pay for all that she does for me," said the much-in-love Neil.
Daya on the other hand says, "I start off a conversation but most of the time, I'm not listening... I just pretend to or else I won't get lucky the next time," he laughs. But unlike Daya, many men agree that having a good conversation brings them closer to their partners. "They feel loved," said Paresh, who cuddles his girlfriend and lets her do the talking. "It's a simple matter of courtesy within any long-term relationship. You should not make love to your other half and leave them feeling unsatisfied," he says. But Ralph admits that he wasn't all ears to his partner before. "She would be a little grumpy in the mornings and when I asked her about it she told me how she used to be eager to engage in a talk while I would pull my blanket over and fall asleep. Now things are different between us," he smiles.
Jignesh has a piece of advice to the women, "We men don't understand your needs until and unless you women tell us about it. After a few lessons in bedroom etiquette, we can do much more than just talking!"
