Wedding Costs!
Source: IRIS (25-NOV-09)
Though some people do not agree to the old proverb- marriages are made in heaven, they all agree that the riches spent behind it are funded only from earth. Where two families meet and two souls unite, there is a long list of rituals and traditions that need to be respected. However, there is no paradigm set for the expenses.
The Wish-list
Who does not wish to have a wedding in the Mittals and the Chatwals style! But ultimately it is you who knows where to draw the line. Yes, marriage has certain requirements - you need a wedding hall; invitation cards, catering services, photographers, orchestra, decorators, guest accommodation, vehicles, trousseau, jewellery, gifts etc. Where to cut the cost and where not is all you need to decide wisely. And we can help you in that with some of the best practiced methods.
The Check-list
The average cost of a standard Indian wedding may range anywhere between Rs 3 lakh and Rs 6 lakh. Though many of the marriages today go beyond this to meet the demands of the other party or display their status, smartness lies in limiting the over-expenses.
The investments
Amid all expenses of wedding, you might be planning to take help from the investments in mutual funds, stocks and the balance in your savings account. Rank them on the basis of returns they generate, liquidate those that deliver the least returns. It is always advisable to avoid borrowing as that might only add to the financial burden. It is much easier to downsize rather than borrow.
The Cost
Cost of expense needs to be planned keeping in mind all the requirements of the marriage. First of all you must have a complete list of all the expense areas so that you can fix and distribute the expense accordingly.
For example write down roughly the number of people you expect will turn up. This is the basis for all further assumptions you would make regarding your wedding expenses. So keep the figure at realistic levels. Next step can be the hunting and finalizing of hall, caterers, and all this as early as possible- preferably 5-6 months in advance. This can help you get best of the deals and you will also have lot of choices to choose from.
The Cuttings
Some of the areas where you can actually cut the cost and be benefited are-
Guest list: Always remember that the longer the guest list, the higher would be the cost. Additional invitations, additional plates for the caterer, additional rooms for accommodation, will all balloon into a big sum. So, try to confine your guest list to the most loved and dear ones. You could always throw a small party for the office colleagues and friends at your home after the marriage.
Invitation
Usual wedding cards are priced anywhere between Rs 15 and Rs 50 a piece. If possible try not to get in the fancy choices as the traditional cards are considered auspicious event today. And yes, they have reasonable rates. One of the money saving moves could be to e-mail your invite and you can use it to invite your friends.
Cuisine
It is an old belief that the number of dishes is discussed more than their tastes at any wedding. This might be true for people who are running in the race of status and symbol. But ultimately it is the quality that counts. It is a wedding and so there cannot be just 3-4 options, but you can always plan the menu with a sincere thought on good `food` and not a good `show`. Arranging it in a buffet could also save a lot of money.
Wedding wear
Most Indians spend heavily on the wedding trousseau. After all he/she has to look the best. But again, a smart choice can meet both the requirements of looking good and saving money. It is not wrong to look of designer unique clothes, but yes, a limitation in price-range must be carried.
Discounts
In most of the instances, marriages are finalized much earlier than the final day of wedding. So, you have ample time to look for or wait for discounts and special offers in shops. Whether it is the wedding wear, the jewelry, gifts, or anything, a discount can help you save a good amount. So, try to be updated on that.
High season
Industry experts say that nearly 70% of weddings take place in May, when venue costs peak because of the demand. Pick an off-season wedding date and your costs of hiring a venue would be significantly lower. Even hiring vehicles would cost you less.
Insurance
The concept of wedding insurance, though not so popular in India, can also be a good step towards avoiding any unpredictable expenses. Normally the wedding insurance policy covers wedding cancellation/postponement due to fire or any natural disaster, accident of the bride/groom, accident of blood relations for a seven-day range (three days prior to the wedding date, the wedding date, and three days after the wedding date), damage to property including the venue, burglary, and even cases of food poisoning at the function. However, there are several cases which are excluded from the criteria of claiming the policy, for example the cancellation of marriage due to dispute between the two families.
Typical wedding insurance plans include Rs 2 lakh, Rs 4 lakh, Rs 6 lakh, and Rs 8 lakh covers, with their premiums (indicative) ranging from Rs 3,770 to Rs 14,276.
http://www.myiris.com/newsCentre/storyShow.php?fileR=20091125190412194&dir=2009/11/25&secID=livenews
Showing posts with label Marriage Messages from Press. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Marriage Messages from Press. Show all posts
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Wedding halls packed to capacity
Wedding halls packed to capacity
TNN 23 November 2009, 11:30pm IST
KANPUR: With more than 10,000 weddings falling on three auspicious days on November 26, 29 and 30, the locals are left with but few options to decide the wedding venue. While the majority of parks, banquet halls, guest houses and wedding lawns got booked 8 to 9 months prior to the wedding dates, those who reached late are finding it hard to book a suitable venue for performing the ceremonies.
Aadietya Pandey, a city based astrologer said, "According to the Hindu custom, the auspicious time for wedding starts from `Devuthan'-- the period when Lord Narayan wakes up after four months of long sleep. On these three days -- November 26, 29 and 30, the sun is transiting in Scorpio which is the sign of planet Mars. This in turn affects the position of planet Jupiter, making these days auspicious."
Another astrologer, Pandit Geeteshwar said, "After December 12, there is hardly any `muhurat'. The planetary positions are not favourable for marriage after November, so a majority of people will tie the knot on these three auspicious days."
At the same time, the shortage of hotels in the city too has made the locals search for other venues as few could afford to book the five star hotels.
"Searching for a wedding venue has become tougher than searching for a life partner. As most of the city halls are booked for the day we had no option but to book a Gurudwara for wedding," said Rahul Kapoor, a software engineer, who will be tying the knot on November 29.
"I have been searching hard to get a suitable place for my wedding party. As such the five star hotels and the palatial bungalows are too expensive to afford. And the strength of members attending the party is too high following which I had to pay double the amount for booking a farm house on the Lucknow- Kanpur highway," said Ashwin Bajpai, a 28-year-old, whose wedding date has been fixed for November 30.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/kanpur/Wedding-halls-packed-to-capacity/articleshow/5262252.cms
TNN 23 November 2009, 11:30pm IST
KANPUR: With more than 10,000 weddings falling on three auspicious days on November 26, 29 and 30, the locals are left with but few options to decide the wedding venue. While the majority of parks, banquet halls, guest houses and wedding lawns got booked 8 to 9 months prior to the wedding dates, those who reached late are finding it hard to book a suitable venue for performing the ceremonies.
Aadietya Pandey, a city based astrologer said, "According to the Hindu custom, the auspicious time for wedding starts from `Devuthan'-- the period when Lord Narayan wakes up after four months of long sleep. On these three days -- November 26, 29 and 30, the sun is transiting in Scorpio which is the sign of planet Mars. This in turn affects the position of planet Jupiter, making these days auspicious."
Another astrologer, Pandit Geeteshwar said, "After December 12, there is hardly any `muhurat'. The planetary positions are not favourable for marriage after November, so a majority of people will tie the knot on these three auspicious days."
At the same time, the shortage of hotels in the city too has made the locals search for other venues as few could afford to book the five star hotels.
"Searching for a wedding venue has become tougher than searching for a life partner. As most of the city halls are booked for the day we had no option but to book a Gurudwara for wedding," said Rahul Kapoor, a software engineer, who will be tying the knot on November 29.
"I have been searching hard to get a suitable place for my wedding party. As such the five star hotels and the palatial bungalows are too expensive to afford. And the strength of members attending the party is too high following which I had to pay double the amount for booking a farm house on the Lucknow- Kanpur highway," said Ashwin Bajpai, a 28-year-old, whose wedding date has been fixed for November 30.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/kanpur/Wedding-halls-packed-to-capacity/articleshow/5262252.cms
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Women As Hindu Priests Have An Edge
Women As Hindu Priests Have An Edge
By Daksha Warty
PUNE, India, Nov 24 (IPS) - Defying Hindu orthodoxy and intolerant male priests, women in Maharashtra state, western India, have revived a Vedic tradition and become priests.
Approximately 700 women, most of them from Pune, a busy metropolis, 164-km south of Mumbai (previously Bombay), have undergone the necessary training since the seventies, and many of them are practicing.
"Women priests perform all kinds of rites - upanayana (thread ceremony), adoption, engagement, marriage, remarriage, conversion, reconversion, house warming, ancestor worship and last rites," says Arya Joshi, 29, a researcher and instructor at the Pune-based Gyan Prabhodini.
Arya told IPS that researchers at the institute are working on simplifying the rites and rituals of the Hindu dharmashastra (code of conduct including moral and social obligations).
"The institution is addressing the spiritual needs of the progressive Hindu who wants to break away from difficult ritualistic offerings," she says.
As priests, the women challenge many stereotypes including caste. Training is open to women from all castes (Brahmins claim they are the only priestly caste), and whether they are single, married, widowed or divorced.
"Our society never asks a male priest whether he is a widower or a divorcee, or single. He conducts the prayers and rituals. So why should women be treated differently," says Arya, who is married and was introduced to Hindu theology by her father, a preacher.
Sunanda Joshi, 64, is a multi-lingual priest. She conducts pujas (prayers) in Marathi, Gujarati and Hindi. She says that her early years were hard, as she had to constantly prove herself. Now, although a widow, she is one of the most sought after women priests in Pune.
She observes a change, over the years, in people's expectations and wants. Many Hindus now prefer to keep the religious rites and rituals short, she says. Also, there's a new concern for the environment - people do not want 'havans' or 'yagnas' where firewood has to be burnt. "They don't want to waste wood nor do they want to create smoke," she says.
In addition, at some of the marriages she has conducted, brides have refused to wear the mangalsutra (a pendant worn on a gold chain or thread to symbolise marriage), she says, because there are no such equivalent ritualistic demands on men. "The girls feel that husbands too must have such customs," she says.
Historically the earliest mention of women participating in ritualistic offerings or Brahmavadinis (those who interpret the scriptures) is in the Rig Veda (between 3300 and 1300 BC, in chapters 5.28 and 10.125). There were 27 Brahmavadinis, who performed rituals and were also acharyas (teachers).
"At the Prabhodini we encourage everyone to participate and read from the text. A copy of the chants is given to everyone," says Arya who is working towards a doctorate on the concept of shraddha (charity) in last rite rituals.
So, does the Hindu laity think a woman priest is different to the traditional male priest? "Women priests are very committed," writes Mahesh Madhukar Prabhudesai who hosted a prayer recently, in a letter of appreciation to the Prabhodini. "They explain all the (steps) offerings during the pujas."
Girish Manohar Mokashi who had a woman priest conduct his mother's last rites says, "The eleventh day rituals were performed. It was a very satisfying and a noble experience. The rituals were explained to us. All (the) family members were made a part of the rituals. We thank the priest for making us feel very close and one with our mother."
A priest has to be fluent in Sanskrit to be able to interpret the rituals to worshippers.
Madhuri Karvade recalls the most difficult part of her training was mastering Sanskrit. She told IPS: "It took me nine years to learn and pronounce the words in Sanskrit. I tried hard specially for the last rites. An old lady was so impressed that she has fixed my services for her last rites!"
What is the reaction of male priests to the invasion of their territory by women?
"It appears we (male priests) are not doing our job properly," says a defensive Rajesh Khodke, 32, a journalist-turned-priest who is the rector of the boys hostel at Gyan Prabhodini, which is located off Tilak Road in the city. "Only women priests are grabbing attention. We too want to be noticed," he complains.
Pradeep Deo, 55, who previously worked in a pharmacy, feels that too much is being made of the women priests. "Whether male or female, we just have to do our job," he says.
Male priests still dominate the profession. "Societal attitudes are changing towards us, but the process is slow," observes Arya.
According to Sunanda, whose 42-year-old divorced daughter is training to be a priest, the few times there has been scepticism about her capabilities, it has been from women. "When we are approached by families, everything goes well till the lady of the house sees us and says a polite no!"
"Women priests are committed and their expertise in conducting the pujas is widely acknowledged," says Arya. "Yet they remain the second choice (after male priests), something that is going to take a long while to change." (END/2009)
http://ipsnews.net/news.asp?idnews=49389
By Daksha Warty
PUNE, India, Nov 24 (IPS) - Defying Hindu orthodoxy and intolerant male priests, women in Maharashtra state, western India, have revived a Vedic tradition and become priests.
Approximately 700 women, most of them from Pune, a busy metropolis, 164-km south of Mumbai (previously Bombay), have undergone the necessary training since the seventies, and many of them are practicing.
"Women priests perform all kinds of rites - upanayana (thread ceremony), adoption, engagement, marriage, remarriage, conversion, reconversion, house warming, ancestor worship and last rites," says Arya Joshi, 29, a researcher and instructor at the Pune-based Gyan Prabhodini.
Arya told IPS that researchers at the institute are working on simplifying the rites and rituals of the Hindu dharmashastra (code of conduct including moral and social obligations).
"The institution is addressing the spiritual needs of the progressive Hindu who wants to break away from difficult ritualistic offerings," she says.
As priests, the women challenge many stereotypes including caste. Training is open to women from all castes (Brahmins claim they are the only priestly caste), and whether they are single, married, widowed or divorced.
"Our society never asks a male priest whether he is a widower or a divorcee, or single. He conducts the prayers and rituals. So why should women be treated differently," says Arya, who is married and was introduced to Hindu theology by her father, a preacher.
Sunanda Joshi, 64, is a multi-lingual priest. She conducts pujas (prayers) in Marathi, Gujarati and Hindi. She says that her early years were hard, as she had to constantly prove herself. Now, although a widow, she is one of the most sought after women priests in Pune.
She observes a change, over the years, in people's expectations and wants. Many Hindus now prefer to keep the religious rites and rituals short, she says. Also, there's a new concern for the environment - people do not want 'havans' or 'yagnas' where firewood has to be burnt. "They don't want to waste wood nor do they want to create smoke," she says.
In addition, at some of the marriages she has conducted, brides have refused to wear the mangalsutra (a pendant worn on a gold chain or thread to symbolise marriage), she says, because there are no such equivalent ritualistic demands on men. "The girls feel that husbands too must have such customs," she says.
Historically the earliest mention of women participating in ritualistic offerings or Brahmavadinis (those who interpret the scriptures) is in the Rig Veda (between 3300 and 1300 BC, in chapters 5.28 and 10.125). There were 27 Brahmavadinis, who performed rituals and were also acharyas (teachers).
"At the Prabhodini we encourage everyone to participate and read from the text. A copy of the chants is given to everyone," says Arya who is working towards a doctorate on the concept of shraddha (charity) in last rite rituals.
So, does the Hindu laity think a woman priest is different to the traditional male priest? "Women priests are very committed," writes Mahesh Madhukar Prabhudesai who hosted a prayer recently, in a letter of appreciation to the Prabhodini. "They explain all the (steps) offerings during the pujas."
Girish Manohar Mokashi who had a woman priest conduct his mother's last rites says, "The eleventh day rituals were performed. It was a very satisfying and a noble experience. The rituals were explained to us. All (the) family members were made a part of the rituals. We thank the priest for making us feel very close and one with our mother."
A priest has to be fluent in Sanskrit to be able to interpret the rituals to worshippers.
Madhuri Karvade recalls the most difficult part of her training was mastering Sanskrit. She told IPS: "It took me nine years to learn and pronounce the words in Sanskrit. I tried hard specially for the last rites. An old lady was so impressed that she has fixed my services for her last rites!"
What is the reaction of male priests to the invasion of their territory by women?
"It appears we (male priests) are not doing our job properly," says a defensive Rajesh Khodke, 32, a journalist-turned-priest who is the rector of the boys hostel at Gyan Prabhodini, which is located off Tilak Road in the city. "Only women priests are grabbing attention. We too want to be noticed," he complains.
Pradeep Deo, 55, who previously worked in a pharmacy, feels that too much is being made of the women priests. "Whether male or female, we just have to do our job," he says.
Male priests still dominate the profession. "Societal attitudes are changing towards us, but the process is slow," observes Arya.
According to Sunanda, whose 42-year-old divorced daughter is training to be a priest, the few times there has been scepticism about her capabilities, it has been from women. "When we are approached by families, everything goes well till the lady of the house sees us and says a polite no!"
"Women priests are committed and their expertise in conducting the pujas is widely acknowledged," says Arya. "Yet they remain the second choice (after male priests), something that is going to take a long while to change." (END/2009)
http://ipsnews.net/news.asp?idnews=49389
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Engagement gifts aren't dowry
Engagement gifts aren't dowry
NAGPUR: Are gifts given during engagement ceremony dowry? May be not, if their value is not “excessive”! In a significant verdict, the Nagpur bench of Bombay high court on Tuesday quashed a police complaint and chargesheet made by the girl’s father against the petitioners for getting back gifts handed over to them during engagement.
The court observed that any present, if it is customary in nature, will not attract punishable provisions of Dowry Prohibition (Amendment) Act, 1986. Asingle-judge bench comprising justice SS Shinde delivered this verdict citing Section 3(2)(b) of the Dowry Prohibition (Amendment) Act, 1986, which states that “nothing applies if such presents are made by, or on behalf of the bride, or any person related to the bride, and such presents are of a customary nature and the value thereof is not excessive having regard to the financial status of the person by whom, or on whose behalf, such presents are given.”
However, according to the act if a person, gives, takes or abets the giving or taking of dowry, he shall be punishable with imprisonment for a term which shall not be less than 5 years, and with fine which shall not be less than Rs 15,000 or the amount of the value of such dowry, whichever is more. Groom’s mother Sunanda and groom Bhushan Kalkotwar were the petitioners in this case.
According to counsel for petitioner Rajendra Daga, Sunanda’s other son Pankaj was engaged to Yamini (name changed) from Brahmapuri in Chandrapur district. During the engagement day on May 22, 2006, Yamini’s father offered petitioners – Sunanda and Bhushan – clothes as per their customs and rituals. Five months later Sunanda’s youngest son went to Yamini’s father at Brahmapuri and asked him for a dowry of Rs 4 lakh. He also warned them that if they were unable to fulfill his demands, the proposed marriage would be cancelled. The girl’s father rejected this demand and that led to cancellation of wedding.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/nagpur/Engagement-gifts-arent-dowry-HC/articleshow/5217648.cms
NAGPUR: Are gifts given during engagement ceremony dowry? May be not, if their value is not “excessive”! In a significant verdict, the Nagpur bench of Bombay high court on Tuesday quashed a police complaint and chargesheet made by the girl’s father against the petitioners for getting back gifts handed over to them during engagement.
The court observed that any present, if it is customary in nature, will not attract punishable provisions of Dowry Prohibition (Amendment) Act, 1986. Asingle-judge bench comprising justice SS Shinde delivered this verdict citing Section 3(2)(b) of the Dowry Prohibition (Amendment) Act, 1986, which states that “nothing applies if such presents are made by, or on behalf of the bride, or any person related to the bride, and such presents are of a customary nature and the value thereof is not excessive having regard to the financial status of the person by whom, or on whose behalf, such presents are given.”
However, according to the act if a person, gives, takes or abets the giving or taking of dowry, he shall be punishable with imprisonment for a term which shall not be less than 5 years, and with fine which shall not be less than Rs 15,000 or the amount of the value of such dowry, whichever is more. Groom’s mother Sunanda and groom Bhushan Kalkotwar were the petitioners in this case.
According to counsel for petitioner Rajendra Daga, Sunanda’s other son Pankaj was engaged to Yamini (name changed) from Brahmapuri in Chandrapur district. During the engagement day on May 22, 2006, Yamini’s father offered petitioners – Sunanda and Bhushan – clothes as per their customs and rituals. Five months later Sunanda’s youngest son went to Yamini’s father at Brahmapuri and asked him for a dowry of Rs 4 lakh. He also warned them that if they were unable to fulfill his demands, the proposed marriage would be cancelled. The girl’s father rejected this demand and that led to cancellation of wedding.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/city/nagpur/Engagement-gifts-arent-dowry-HC/articleshow/5217648.cms
Saturday, October 31, 2009
Maintaining age difference for a blissful marriage
Maintaining age difference for a blissful marriage
Chitranjan Sawant, Sat, Oct 31, 2009 12:59:58 IST
In ancient times, both the bride and the groom practiced Brahmacharya till marriage, which made all the difference. That provided clarity of thought and expression as well as virility. The aim of marriage was clear to both - procreation
MARRYING AFTER a hectic courtship? Well, both the husband and wife have a joint vision of what life in Grihasth Ashram is likely to be. Though they have many dream for a happy, settled life together, he fact remains that their age would likely be the same and their life experience till then would consist of school and college.
The government, after a discussion with the physicians and marriage counsellors arrived at the magic figure of 21 as the appropriate age to marry and five as the difference in age between the hubby-to-be and his sweetheart. She should be his junior to let him boss over her taking an advantage of his seniority.
In the Vedic vivah in India and elsewhere, it is recommended that a wife should be a junior. The bride may be 16 or what but, the groom should only get married after completing his education in a Gurukul; a process tha takes at least 25 years.
When I mentioned this in a circle of teenagers and elicited their opinion, one chirpy little thing twitted"if I am sixteen I am not going to marry an old fellow who is 25 and waste my life. If I talk of cheese, he will talk of chalk. The marriage will be on the rocks before you can say a word."
How did they manage in ancient times, I thought aloud. Well, both the bride and the groom practiced Brahmacharya then, which made all the difference. That provided clarity of thought and expression as well as virility in bed. The aim of marriage was clear to both - procreation. Arrival of a son or a daughter into this world within one year of marriage was a foregone conclusion.
Now the thought process has changed, said the bride-to-be. Marriage is fun. It is for enjoyment. If you procreate and have an issue within one year of the Saptpadi or tying the knot, then they would be changing the nappies of the baby all the time. The marital enjoyment will be gone for good.
The two schools of thought are diametrically opposite. We reverted to the main topic. What should be the age difference between the bride and her groom? The general consensus was: Back to the Vedas. Let us do what the Vedic injunction orders us to do. Maintain brahmacharya until graduation and marry thereafter, maintaining an age difference of seven or eight years, procreate well and lead a life of bliss.
The vedas say; blessed are they who go through the four ashrams and fulfil the obligations to self and society
http://www.merinews.com/article/maintaining-age-difference-for-a-blissful-marriage/15787251.shtml
Chitranjan Sawant, Sat, Oct 31, 2009 12:59:58 IST
In ancient times, both the bride and the groom practiced Brahmacharya till marriage, which made all the difference. That provided clarity of thought and expression as well as virility. The aim of marriage was clear to both - procreation
MARRYING AFTER a hectic courtship? Well, both the husband and wife have a joint vision of what life in Grihasth Ashram is likely to be. Though they have many dream for a happy, settled life together, he fact remains that their age would likely be the same and their life experience till then would consist of school and college.
The government, after a discussion with the physicians and marriage counsellors arrived at the magic figure of 21 as the appropriate age to marry and five as the difference in age between the hubby-to-be and his sweetheart. She should be his junior to let him boss over her taking an advantage of his seniority.
In the Vedic vivah in India and elsewhere, it is recommended that a wife should be a junior. The bride may be 16 or what but, the groom should only get married after completing his education in a Gurukul; a process tha takes at least 25 years.
When I mentioned this in a circle of teenagers and elicited their opinion, one chirpy little thing twitted"if I am sixteen I am not going to marry an old fellow who is 25 and waste my life. If I talk of cheese, he will talk of chalk. The marriage will be on the rocks before you can say a word."
How did they manage in ancient times, I thought aloud. Well, both the bride and the groom practiced Brahmacharya then, which made all the difference. That provided clarity of thought and expression as well as virility in bed. The aim of marriage was clear to both - procreation. Arrival of a son or a daughter into this world within one year of marriage was a foregone conclusion.
Now the thought process has changed, said the bride-to-be. Marriage is fun. It is for enjoyment. If you procreate and have an issue within one year of the Saptpadi or tying the knot, then they would be changing the nappies of the baby all the time. The marital enjoyment will be gone for good.
The two schools of thought are diametrically opposite. We reverted to the main topic. What should be the age difference between the bride and her groom? The general consensus was: Back to the Vedas. Let us do what the Vedic injunction orders us to do. Maintain brahmacharya until graduation and marry thereafter, maintaining an age difference of seven or eight years, procreate well and lead a life of bliss.
The vedas say; blessed are they who go through the four ashrams and fulfil the obligations to self and society
http://www.merinews.com/article/maintaining-age-difference-for-a-blissful-marriage/15787251.shtml
Wedding the modern and traditional
Wedding the modern and traditional
October 30. 2009 9:50PM GMT
BANGALORE // Dressed in an exquisite salmon pink and gold sari, and wearing traditional gold jewellery and jasmine flowers in her hair, the bride entered the marriage hall holding betel leaves and a betel nut, which she would carry throughout the wedding.
Her entrance was heralded by more than two dozen traditional drummers and a procession of men playing trumpets, while a decorated elephant lingered outside. The bride’s girl friends were dressed in green and gold silk saris and holding kalashas (brass pots containing coconut and mango leaves, which are auspicious symbols of marriage). The men wore traditional dhoti and kurta with shawls on their shoulders and carried brightly coloured ceremonial umbrellas. The two groups escorted the bride down the red carpet and on to the stage. The groom, resplendent in a maroon dhoti, beige kurta and matching turban, joined her shortly after as thousands of guests looked on.
It was not only the celebration of a marriage, and one of the biggest social events of the year, it was also a union of the modern and traditional.
The bride was Seema Shetty, the youngest daughter of the renowned doctors Bavaguthu Raghuram and Chandrakumari Shetty, who founded the New Medical Centre group of hospitals and pharmacies scattered across the Emirates, as well as UAE Exchange, one of the largest money transfer and exchange companies in the GCC.
Miss Shetty, 27, however, is a successful businesswoman in her own right; the founder of BiteRite, the health-food chain, she is also the owner of Zari Zardozi, an Indian restaurant group in Abu Dhabi. She exemplifies the new generation of women in the Emirates who have embraced modern business and commerce practices and who are setting the agenda in their chosen fields.
By contrast, her wedding was in keeping with centuries-old traditions that are integral to the life of an Indian woman, modern or otherwise: she married the man chosen for her by her parents, in a ceremony that reflected her roots and respected her culture.
“It was always inculcated into us that I would have an arranged marriage to someone who hailed from our community and had similar values. It was rooted in us at an early age and that made it easy for us to respect our parents’ wishes when the time came,” she said.
However, Miss Shetty was the driving force behind the organisation of the huge celebration.
“This is all Seema’s doing,” said her father, proudly surveying the crowd and dressed in a stylish long kurta and a traditional dhoti. “It is that generation, with all their contacts and friends. All these people are here for her.”
Born in Abu Dhabi, Miss Shetty graduated from Boston University in 2003 with a degree in business administration.
“I think our generation is a global one,” said Yazan Alattia, a friend of the bride who had arrived from Canada for the festivities. “Born in one place, raised in another, studied somewhere, working somewhere else. Yet many of us, after leaving a place, tend to lose touch with those friends but Seema, with her charisma, is one of the distinct few who is able to balance her career and relationships.
“[The fact that] her friends here have made it from across the globe, from as far as North America and the Caribbean, to attend this wedding is an attestation to this.”
Marriage means Miss Shetty must leave her family and friends in the UAE to go to live with her new husband. Nirman Shetty, 29, is a property strategist for the Lodha group of developers based in Mumbai.
Their wedding last weekend saw thousands of guests travel to Bangalore, a south Indian city in the state of Karnataka, for the celebrations. They came from the UAE and all over the world.
Old friends and relatives mingled with multimillionaire businessmen, an adviser to a sheikh, and Indian politicians, among other high-profile guests. The main reception, in the grounds of Bangalore Palace, was attended by 12,000 well-wishers.
Eight months earlier, Miss Shetty’s father had met Nirman and, having approved of the young man, arranged for the two families to meet. They got together for the first time over brunch where the prospective spouse found the courage to ask to speak briefly to Miss Shetty in private. She suggested they go for a drive, which lasted four hours, and they spent the rest of the day together.
“We spoke about all sorts of things. laughed some, debated a little, and it felt like not more than 10 minutes had gone by,” said Nirman. “As you can imagine, this story does have a happy ending. A very, very happy ending. It is also a new beginning.”
An evening of entertainment, called Sangeeth, kicked off the wedding festivities, where Miss Shetty’s friends, having practised their dance routines in Abu Dhabi for more than two months, finally got to perform them. Then, through song and dance, Miss Shetty performed a sketch that showed her telling future grandchildren of how she met Nirman.
Omar and Avan al Mutwali, her high-school friends from Choueifat in Abu Dhabi, were involved in two other dances that evening.
“The atmosphere, the lights, music, stage, during the actual dance was indescribable. We enjoyed the dances so much that the time flew by,” said Avan. “We felt this was a really personal contribution from us to Seema and Nirman.”
A day before the wedding, Miss Shetty’s parents’ garden, decorated with garlands of marigolds and lanterns, had been taken over by the women who congregated for Mehndi. The traditional ceremony saw intricate, henna-paste designs applied to the palms of the bride and her entourage.
Later that evening, at sunset, one of the main south Indian marriage rituals took place to signify Miss Shetty’s move from her father’s home into her husband’s abode.
Dressed in a stunning blue and gold silk sari, with jasmine flowers in her hair, she was led to the Mantapam, the main stage, by her aunts for the Muhurtham, a ceremony where the bride is presented with rings for her toes, which in south India signifies that a woman is married, and wedding rings for her fingers.
The next day at dawn, guests rushed to the Bangalore Palace grounds for the main wedding ceremony. Driven by her brother, Binay, the bride arrived in a vintage Mercedes decorated with yellow lilies and red roses. That evening, the main reception brought everyone together, incorporating the city and all its well- wishers.
After five or six hours, the feasting and festivities came to an end, but the smile the exhausted bride still wore was one of pure happiness.
sbhattacharya@thenational.ae
http://www.thenational.ae/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20091031/NATIONAL/710309765/1010
Thursday, October 22, 2009
Couples ditch the church and opt for cheaper registry weddings
Couples ditch the church and opt for cheaper registry weddings
By Georgie Pilcher
Herald Sun
October 21, 2009 12:01am
HERE comes the no-fuss bride: more couples are ditching the church and opting for cheaper and easier registry weddings.
Civil ceremonies and town hall weddings have jumped in the past five years as couples marry without the fanfare or religious rituals.
Of Victorian weddings last year, 63 per cent were performed by civil celebrants. Just 36 per cent of couples preferred the church, the Herald Sun reports.
Figures from the Victorian Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages show more than 17,500 people married at a civil ceremony last year compared with 14,173 in 2004.
Just 9476 people married at a church last year down from 11,117 in 2004.
The number of people marrying at the Victorian Marriage Registry has also jumped to a record 3399 in 2008.
On Tuesday, 10 couples tied the knot at the Old Treasury Building with marriages scheduled in half-hour slots from 10am to 5.30pm.
Ceremonies range in price from $250 to $320 depending on the size of the room, and it usually takes at least six weeks from the booking to get hitched.
Janine Kupfer, 38, married her second husband Marcus at the Spring St landmark on Valentine's Day, with 29 other couples.
"I didn't want all the fuss, that's why I didn't want the church to do it," she said.
"I am not religious and it would be hypocritical to get married in a church when I have never been."
Ms Kupfer paid $330 and said her mother was concerned a registry wedding was cheap and nasty.
"It is different to how it was in the old days, there are a lot of misconceptions with the older generations. It is classy and ladies do get dressed up," she said.
Relationships Australia (Victoria) spokeswoman Ingrid Sturmey said the trend away from church weddings was in line with many young people ditching religion.
"The idea of a god blessing their relationship isn't relevant to them," she said.
"People are saying 'it is up to us, we are committing to each other and not to God'."
She said attitudes to marriage had become more relaxed with the commitment ceremonies becoming simpler, cheaper and often after a couple have had children.
The registry ceremony was no longer the poor man's wedding, but the merely the "formal stuff " followed by a huge party afterwards
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,26239860-36398,00.html
By Georgie Pilcher
Herald Sun
October 21, 2009 12:01am
HERE comes the no-fuss bride: more couples are ditching the church and opting for cheaper and easier registry weddings.
Civil ceremonies and town hall weddings have jumped in the past five years as couples marry without the fanfare or religious rituals.
Of Victorian weddings last year, 63 per cent were performed by civil celebrants. Just 36 per cent of couples preferred the church, the Herald Sun reports.
Figures from the Victorian Registry of Births, Deaths and Marriages show more than 17,500 people married at a civil ceremony last year compared with 14,173 in 2004.
Just 9476 people married at a church last year down from 11,117 in 2004.
The number of people marrying at the Victorian Marriage Registry has also jumped to a record 3399 in 2008.
On Tuesday, 10 couples tied the knot at the Old Treasury Building with marriages scheduled in half-hour slots from 10am to 5.30pm.
Ceremonies range in price from $250 to $320 depending on the size of the room, and it usually takes at least six weeks from the booking to get hitched.
Janine Kupfer, 38, married her second husband Marcus at the Spring St landmark on Valentine's Day, with 29 other couples.
"I didn't want all the fuss, that's why I didn't want the church to do it," she said.
"I am not religious and it would be hypocritical to get married in a church when I have never been."
Ms Kupfer paid $330 and said her mother was concerned a registry wedding was cheap and nasty.
"It is different to how it was in the old days, there are a lot of misconceptions with the older generations. It is classy and ladies do get dressed up," she said.
Relationships Australia (Victoria) spokeswoman Ingrid Sturmey said the trend away from church weddings was in line with many young people ditching religion.
"The idea of a god blessing their relationship isn't relevant to them," she said.
"People are saying 'it is up to us, we are committing to each other and not to God'."
She said attitudes to marriage had become more relaxed with the commitment ceremonies becoming simpler, cheaper and often after a couple have had children.
The registry ceremony was no longer the poor man's wedding, but the merely the "formal stuff " followed by a huge party afterwards
http://www.news.com.au/story/0,27574,26239860-36398,00.html
Love and Marriage – Chronological Notes
Love and Marriage – Chronological Notes
By Tana L. Pedersen
22 October 2009
From the wooing to the wedding ceremony, every culture, country, and religion has its own strange and unique ways to celebrate the joining of two people in holy matrimony.
ca. 200 BC
By Tana L. Pedersen
22 October 2009
From the wooing to the wedding ceremony, every culture, country, and religion has its own strange and unique ways to celebrate the joining of two people in holy matrimony.
ca. 200 BC
Some of the best marriages don’t begin until one or more of the parties is dead. In China a family can have its deceased (and single) loved one married to a living partner in order to continue the family line. The wedding ceremony is traditional with the exception of the bride or bridegroom being represented by a wooden, paper, or fabric likeness.
ca. 100 BC
Auctioning off women to the highest bidder doesn’t sound very palatable to modern ears, but the Samnite tribes of ancient Italy find a way to turn it into a charity event. The town’s beauties — who will pull in a good price — are sold first. Then the proceeds from their sales are used to buy husbands for their less attractive counterparts.
ca. 100
A simple kiss at the altar. It’s a predictable scene at almost every wedding ceremony. Today it’s a sign of affection, but 2,000 years ago in Rome, a kiss is required to make any contract legally binding. Marriage is no exception.
860
If you’re a Christian man getting ready to take a bride, Pope Nicholas I makes it a little more costly by requiring a men to present his love with an engagement ring. And a circle made of woven reeds or an iron bauble won’t do. The band must be made from gold to show the man’s ability to take care of his future wife.
1000
If Freud had lived in medieval Scandinavia he surely would have had something to say about this courtship custom. When it’s time to find an eligible mate for a daughter, a father has her wear an empty sheath on her belt. If a man wants to make an offer for her, he places his knife in the sheath and negotiations begin.
1288
Leave it to the Scots to take Sadie Hawkins Day to the next level. A new law permits a woman to ask a reluctant bachelor for his hand in marriage — as long as it’s leap year. If he refuses, he may be fined up to one pound.
1733
According to preacher Jonathan Edwards, Satan is taking over colonial America. How did he get his foot in the door? Bundling. Because of the distance suitors must travel to visit their sweethearts (not to mention the cold New England temperatures), courting couples are allowed to spend the night together in bed, fully clothed with a bundling board placed in between them.
1800
Slaves living in the United States are considered property, and as such they have no legal right to marry. But that doesn’t stop couples from joining their lives together in unsanctioned ceremonies. In front of family and friends, the man and woman jump over a broom together to signify their commitment to each other.
1902
Cross-dressing may not be on everyone’s post-nuptial to-do list. But for the men in the Maasai tribe in Africa it’s their way of walking a mile in their wives’ shoes, or rather dresses. Luckily the ritual lasts for only a month.
1918
If your first act after saying “I do” is a scenic tour through the city and a visit to war memorials, you must be living in post-revolutionary Russia. When the communist government issues new “family codes” that strip religion from matrimony, it changes the way their citizens marry — and celebrate — and gives rise to new customs, such as the tour of the city, the progulka.
2007
“Miss World Marries Tree.” It sounds like a headline ripped from the tabloids, but in this case it’s Hindu tradition. When astrology charts reveal that beauty contestant and Bollywood star Aishwarya Rai is a manglik, she does the only thing a girl can do: exchange vows with a peepal or a banana tree. According to custom, the first marriage of a manglik can end in disaster, including divorce or death. To combat the curse, Aishwarya must first marry an inanimate object such as a tree.
http://www.ancestrymagazine.com/2009/10/history/love-and-marriage/
Saturday, October 10, 2009
India’s Romeo and Juliet tragedy
India’s Romeo and Juliet tragedy
Majumder
BBC News, Phaphunda, India
It was a story buried in the middle of the Indian newspapers.
Two star-crossed lovers committed suicide after the local village council, or panchayat, ordered them to annul their marriage or face death.
Amreen was Muslim and her husband, Lokesh, a Hindu. Their match was simply unacceptable to their communities. The couple poisoned themselves.
Now police have charged the entire panchayat with abetting suicide.
‘Fatal mistake’
To find out more, we headed east from Delhi into the north Indian countryside.
A little more than two hours later, we found ourselves in the village of Phaphunda.
Like most others in the area, it was small and unremarkable.
The villagers, mostly farmers, live in houses built close to each other, with narrow lanes running through them. Horse-carts and cattle amble along - Delhi seems far away.
Attitudes here can be unforgiving. I headed first to the house of the village chief, Achan Singh, who heads the village council.
A tall, well-built man in his 40s, he was very welcoming, pouring out steaming cups of tea as we sat on his carpet.
Yes, he had heard about the incident but no it was not his panchayat that had anything to do with it.
“It was a gathering of elders from the two families,” he told me.
“The boy and girl were told that their marriage would not be allowed. They would have to leave each other or else they would be killed,” he said in a matter of fact way.
Pressed further, Mr Singh sympathised with the couple but said they had made a fatal mistake.
“You see, they fell in love and then ran away to get married. They should have stayed away and lived in the city.
“In our village, Hindus marry Hindus and Muslims marry Muslims. It’s very sad, what happened but what can you expect? The pressure on their families was enormous. They were being disgraced and dishonoured.”
Very nervous
Our local contact had arranged for us to meet the family of Amreen, the dead girl.
As we left Achan Singh’s house, he said he would join us. He revved up his motorcycle and rode off ahead, while we followed.
When we reached Amreen’s home, the village headman was already there. He had apparently arrived well ahead of us.
Her family lived across the highway in a predominantly Muslim part of the village.
A mosque was visible over the high walls of her father’s large farmhouse. Inside, buffalo were tethered to posts - he sold milk for a living.
“The boy, Lokesh, would come here every morning to buy milk. That’s how he met the girl and they fell in love,” one of the villagers told me.
The girl’s father, Salim, soon joined us for a conversation but it was soon apparent that he was very nervous.
“I really don’t know what happened,” he kept saying.
I asked him if he had come under pressure from the panchayat.
“No, no, there was no pressure,” he said hurriedly glancing over his shoulder at the chief.
‘Dishonoured’
“Go on, tell them how you were dishonoured in the community,” Achan Singh prompted him gently but firmly.
“We were dishonoured in the community,” repeated Salim.
“Neither family wanted them to marry. But no-one threatened them either,” he maintained.
The girl’s aunt, Syeda, who had been listening in while tending to her sick mother, decided to speak up.
“She was a lovely girl, very innocent and always used to read the Koran. God knows what madness prompted her to run away with that boy. We’re all very sad at what happened.”
It was obvious I was going to get little more out of the family so we left and headed to the office of the local policeman for a little more clarity.
“We got to hear about the incident and decided to act,” said police superintendent Sharad Sachan.
“The young couple were legally married and therefore entitled to live together. Their parents and the villagers had no right to put pressure on them and force them to commit suicide. They are guilty of a crime and we will do all we can to build a case against them.”
As we headed back to Delhi, it was clear that with a wall of secrecy descending around the whole incident, the police were going to have their work cut out.
They may have the law on their side but the villagers are defending ancient codes and traditions that remain untouched by modernity. And they will fight to keep it that way.
Source: BBC
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Worry Is A Voluntary Form Of Suffering
Worry Is A Voluntary Form Of Suffering
Swami Sukhabodhananda 8 October 2009
What is it to be a witness, to just be?
The Buddha was once meditating. His mind started creating problems and distracted him from the path of enlightenment. It was as though hundreds of horses were galloping through his mind. But the monk remained a witness and did not identify with fear. His mind turned into thousands of elephants tempting him to identify with them, but again Buddha was just a witness... he saw through the mind's game. His mind became a loving deer but still Buddha remained a witness. He did not get tempted.
Finally, his mind turned into a loving child drowning in the ocean, seeking his attention. Buddha, out of compassion, merged with his thoughts and stretched out his hands to save the drowning child. At once, the child turned into a monster and started pulling Buddha to the ocean. Buddha realised his folly and left the monster and continued being a witness. The monster turned again into a child and started pleading for help.
Buddha continued his meditation of being not participating but being a witness. The child drowned in the ocean and emerged as an enlightened mind, reflecting Buddha's mind. This is a play narrating Buddha's effort towards enlightenment.
Is the shunning of identification an important aspect of meditation?
Learn to be a witness to your thoughts and feelings. In the witnessing consciousness, there is no identification with anything. Identification leads to misery. Worry is a form of identification. Literally, worry means twisting and tearing. Have you observed that when you worry, your moving centre gets twisted? Negative state of worry depression or fear... shows up strongly in the form of twisting one's body-moving centre.
Just be a witness and do not get identified. Relax your body, your mind and then finally just be a witness. Let not your 'I' get identified with your body and mind. This de-identification is meditation.
What about emotions in a state of worry?
Firstly, negative emotional states like that of worry and jealousy must be observed and recognised. Generally, we do not see them. Instead, we become them. While a negative emotion is happening, be an onlooker. Then the emotion will be like a cloud that comes and goes.
To stop a negative emotion that comes out, create a new will through the intellectual centre. This is not suppression as you are doing it with an understanding that if negative emotion is let loose, it will create a hurt body. In turn this hurt body will take control of you.
Worry is a form of identification. It is useless. Unfortunately, many of us think it is right to worry about someone we love. Give up this voluntary form of suffering. By worrying you exhaust yourself. Your energy gets depleted. In a depleted state, one cannot perform to the optimum level. Learn to take small steps, stop worrying. Weed out the worry as it emerges. Do not allow the other centres to support and nourish it.
What do you mean when you say we live in two worlds ?
One is visible and outer while the other is invisible and inner. The outer is your body that is visible. The inner is your psychology. The object of spiritual teaching is to lead a person from unconscious being to conscious being.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/spirituality/speaking-tree/Worry-Is-A-Voluntary-Form-Of-Suffering/articleshow/5098909.cms
The divine aspect of an ideal relationship
The divine aspect of an ideal relationship
YOGI ASHWINI 7 October 2009,
YOGI ASHWINI 7 October 2009,
Everything in the universe is in its place because of balance. A harmonious balance between two complementary forces is an integral part of nature.
As the half-female, half-male Ardhanareshwar, Shiva represents the union of Parvati as Prakriti, the energy force, and Shiva as Purusha, the two manifest aspects of the Cosmic Consciousness, Brahmn.
Both Prakriti and Purusha are two different aspects of nature and they come together to form a perfect, harmonious balance between two complementary forces. This is the concept of marriage in Vedic philosophy.
The marriage of two individuals is intended to create a harmonious balance very similar to that of the Ardhanareshwar. They come together to form a union, becoming an inseparable part of each other’s lives, subsuming their individual identities for a holistic relationship that was founded on mutual give and take. The partners take care of each other’s needs for the rest of their lives with mutual devotion, dignity and respect. The relationship might extend further to include children – if the couple had children – and to the rest of the family like parents and other close relatives.
Woman is considered as the force or Shakti in a man’s life. How long a marital relationship lasts would depend upon the evolution of that relationship – the higher the purpose, the longer the union would be. The bonds are established between two individuals at the level of chakras or energy centres. There are certain characteristics pertaining to each chakra, and the union happens at the level of these characteristics.
The lowest level is that of basic earthly desires, characteristics of the mooladhar chakra, pertaining to the satisfaction of grosser needs like sharing of wealth and belongings. There’s no higher purpose of the two partners coming together. A little above this is the connection based on sexual desires at the level of the swadhishthan chakra, at the level of physical Creation. Above this is the connection established on the plane of power, be it social, political, or economic, at the manipoorak chakra.
Most marriages exist at the level of attachment, when the partners feel that one cannot exist without the other. When this is misunderstood to be love, there are chances of a weakening of the relationship. The basic concept behind the marriage is that of ‘togetherness and oneness’, and this is found to be lacking in these relationships. People tend to get tied up, blinded by their own selfishness that they come to value individual needs more than the equitable give and take harmonious balance represented by the Ardhanareshwar symbol.
A connection formed on the basis of love is much higher and has no ties. It is established at the anahat chakra, the seat of selfless love. Love can never hold you back. It will not tie you down with emotions and conditions. It is selfless. Love sets you free because you are happy in the happiness of the person you love, unconditionally.
Even rarer are the connections established at the level of vishudhi chakra that are based on higher forms of creativity, where people come together when they have risen above their own selfish needs and can now think beyond themselves.
Then comes the highest energy centre in a being, the ajna chakra that is the seat of Shiva in the human body. The connection formed here is so subtle that in the current flow of circumstances, it might be very difficult indeed to find it. Such a union would be similar to that of Shiva and Shakti, complete in every respect.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/spirituality/speaking-tree/The-divine-aspect-of-an-ideal-relationship/articleshow/5096821.cms
Vedic wedding in city for US-born couples
Vedic wedding in city for US-born couples
Viju B, TNN 6 October 2009,
MUMBAI: Amy Pearce blushed into her pallu as Rohini Kumar, parikarmi (master of ceremonies), chanted a Sanskrit mantra and then translated it into English: “This means you will have to take good care of all your cows.’’ He then added helpfully: “Hope you have many cows in your backyard.’’
Pearce sat cross-legged besides her 6-foot, 4-inch bridegroom, Mark Terza, a physiotherapist-turned-yoga fanatic, blinking as the thick havan smoke enveloped the hall. But they weren’t the only Americans getting hitched in desi style in Mumbai. Beside them sat yet another couple—New York-based builder T J Macchiaroli and Melinda Pizzano, who runs a flourishing upcountry spa in Putnam County in New York.
The couples garlanded each other amidst Vedic chants at the Radha Gopinath Temple at Chowpatty on Monday morning. The guests of honour were 14 other yoga enthusiasts, also from the US of A, brought to India on a whirlwind 13-day spiritual tour by group leader Reghunath. “This is a historic first for Mumbai. Although we’ve had many such Vedic weddings for Indian couples in the past, this is the first time two American couples have decided to take the plunge into Indian culture together. And it all began after they started doing yoga,’’ Radha Gopinath Temple founder Radhanath Swami said.
Pearce and Terza had decided to get married in India after they met two years ago. And, while doing that, they affirmed that yoga was the “organic thread’’ that united them. “She was my yoga guru and I fell in love with my guru. I hope that is okay,’’ Terza, now a partner in his wife’s yoga school in New York, said laughingly.
They aren’t the flower children of the 1970s or the 1980s. “We don’t do drugs, we don’t drink and we don’t touch alcohol. Neither are we into Floyd or Dylan. We, follow, instead, the scientific principle of living that is mentioned in Patanjali’s Yogasutra,’’ guru Pearce explained. Macchiaroli and Melinda, on the other hand, knew each other from school but “both of us went our separate ways till I came back to learn yoga from her’’ says the bridegroom.
Swami even made a small speech at the wedding, explaining that even Mahatma Gandhi had problems in his marriage. “But everything great does not come easy. You can easily have a one-night stand. But if a marriage has to survive, it needs to be based on a higher principle,’’ he said.
Yoga, according to him, unites people’s souls. “The Americans are now slowly moving towards the next step, that is understanding Indian spirituality and culture through yoga,’’ he said.
The group travelled to pilgrimage destinations like Haridwar, Devaprayag and Vrindavan, took a holy dip in the Ganga and even interacted with “spiritual masters’’ in the Himalayas for this initiation. “The greatest experience I had in my life was at Devaprayag, where we prayed into the twilight chanting Hare Krishna. I understood then what yoga really meant—the union of myself with the cosmic soul,’’ Ameliese Savchak, an HR manager with Pepsico and a yoga practitioner for the last three years, said.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/news/city/mumbai/Vedic-wedding-in-city-for-US-born-couples/articleshow/5092182.cms
Child marriages still child’s play
Child marriages still child’s play
Submitted by Sarthak Gupta on Wed, 10/07/2009
Submitted by Sarthak Gupta on Wed, 10/07/2009
They have altered the tradition to keep the social ill going.
Akha Teej, or Akshaya Tritya, an auspicious day in Hindu calendar, was the chosen day for child marriages in Rajasthan. A revised law and a watchful administration have seen fewer children, some as young as one, being married off on the day, but underage marriages are rampant across the state (see box).
Two years after the Prohibition of Child Marriage Act, 2006 was notified, fewer marriages are solemnised on the day.
Villagers lie low to avoid trouble. “The marriages are held at hidden locations,” an official of the department of women and child development, who didn’t wish to be identified, said.
In rural areas, thrust is now on convenience, not auspicious date. “People know that the administration keeps a vigil on this day. So, they’ve changed their way of carrying on the tradition,” said Ratna Gaikwad of Mamta Health Institute for Mother and Child, an NGO in Jaipur. Akha Teej falls during the wedding season, April-June, every year. It was on April 27 this time. Anytime of the day is considered auspicious for a wedding.
“Even political leaders support these marriages, more so during the time of elections,” said Gaikwad.
Caution is the watchword. No invitations are sent out; instead wedding cards announce the wedding of an elder brother or sister, who is a major.
“But in the same mandap (area in which the wedding rituals are performed), they often get the younger one also married off, even if he or she is only a year old,” said Chajju Ram Jat, a social worker in Rainwal, a village 30 km away from Jaipur.
“I’ll save money if I can marry off all my daughters in the same mandap. We can’t afford a separate one for each,” said Hanuman Jat, a villager in the Tonk district.
Unless issues like gender norms and livelihood were addressed, the practice will continue, said Sreela Das Gupta of the International Centre for Research on Women.
“It is essential that the community and its leaders support the campaign against child marriage,” said Samuel Mawunganidze, Unicef’s Rajasthan chief.
http://www.topnews.in/child-marriages-still-child-s-play-2221632
Saturday, October 3, 2009
Mock marriage to help real marriage in Orissa
Mock marriage to help real marriage in Orissa
November 14th, 2007 - 2:53 am ICT by admin
Shampur (Orissa), Oct. 26 (ANI): Villagers of Shampur near Bhubaneshvar, the capital of Orissa, celebrate a festival when girls participate in a mock marriage ceremony with the hope that it would help them find a good match.
The festival is known as Kumar Purnima, when the unmarried girls dress themselves as brides and grooms and participate in the marriage procession. Later they go through rituals similar to a marriage.
“I am happy wearing bridal dress. They dressed me with a new saree and jewellery.” said Subhasmita Behera.
“They put headgear on my head and dressed me as groom. I am happy wearing this attire,” said Sasmita, disguised as a bridegroom.
The marriage procession goes to the ‘girls’ house’.
The marriage is solemnised in the traditional way and guests from 10 neighbouring villages attend the function. They also participate in a ‘feast’, which is real and as sumptuous as in a real marriage ceremony.
Parents of the bride do not shed any tears because the symbolic marriage lasts one day. Both — the bride and groom - return to their respective homes on conclusion of the ceremony.
A Kumari (or, virgin) priest solemnises the ceremony assisted by a male priest.
One difference is that both the ‘bride’ and the ‘groom’ are girls.
The local belief is that if unmarried girls go through all the marriage rituals on the auspicious occasion of Kumar Purnima, they would be blessed with a handsome groom within a year.
“This is the tradition. We believe that if unmarried girls participate in this ceremony, they will be married soon and even get a handsome groom. It is organised on Shukla Paksh Purnima of Dusshera month in the Ashwin month as per Hindu calendar,” informed Manjulata Sahoo, a local.
The parents of the girls bear the marriage expenses. The day after the ‘marriage’, the girls worship Tulsi plant
If the girls are really married during the next few months, the credit goes to the ceremony, and the belief travels round Orissa. (ANI)
http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/india-news/mock-marriage-to-help-real-marriage-in-orissa_1002662.html
November 14th, 2007 - 2:53 am ICT by admin
Shampur (Orissa), Oct. 26 (ANI): Villagers of Shampur near Bhubaneshvar, the capital of Orissa, celebrate a festival when girls participate in a mock marriage ceremony with the hope that it would help them find a good match.
The festival is known as Kumar Purnima, when the unmarried girls dress themselves as brides and grooms and participate in the marriage procession. Later they go through rituals similar to a marriage.
“I am happy wearing bridal dress. They dressed me with a new saree and jewellery.” said Subhasmita Behera.
“They put headgear on my head and dressed me as groom. I am happy wearing this attire,” said Sasmita, disguised as a bridegroom.
The marriage procession goes to the ‘girls’ house’.
The marriage is solemnised in the traditional way and guests from 10 neighbouring villages attend the function. They also participate in a ‘feast’, which is real and as sumptuous as in a real marriage ceremony.
Parents of the bride do not shed any tears because the symbolic marriage lasts one day. Both — the bride and groom - return to their respective homes on conclusion of the ceremony.
A Kumari (or, virgin) priest solemnises the ceremony assisted by a male priest.
One difference is that both the ‘bride’ and the ‘groom’ are girls.
The local belief is that if unmarried girls go through all the marriage rituals on the auspicious occasion of Kumar Purnima, they would be blessed with a handsome groom within a year.
“This is the tradition. We believe that if unmarried girls participate in this ceremony, they will be married soon and even get a handsome groom. It is organised on Shukla Paksh Purnima of Dusshera month in the Ashwin month as per Hindu calendar,” informed Manjulata Sahoo, a local.
The parents of the girls bear the marriage expenses. The day after the ‘marriage’, the girls worship Tulsi plant
If the girls are really married during the next few months, the credit goes to the ceremony, and the belief travels round Orissa. (ANI)
http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/india-news/mock-marriage-to-help-real-marriage-in-orissa_1002662.html
Mock marriage held for good husbands in Orissa
Mock marriage held for good husbands in Orissa
October 3rd, 2009 - 11:01 pm ICT by ANI –
Shampur (Orissa): A mock marriage ceremony meant for seeking good matrimonial alliance was held here on Saturday on the occasion of ‘Kumari Poornima’, an ancient custom of Orissa.
Two underage girls performed bride and groom in the mock wedding ceremony in Shampur village.
Village’s unmarried girls assembled on this occasion to witness the mock marriage as a 10-year-old tied nuptial knot with a seven-year-old here.
The objective of the ceremony is to seek blessings of God for good husbands for all village girls of marriageable age.
“Rituals are like original marriage. Starting from bringing holy water from the seven homes to going to the temple before marriage to take the blessings of God. Everything is done as per the rituals of a Hindu marriage,” said Pushplata Sahoo, a villager.
The ritual is being held for the past 27 years in Shampur, and the expenses are borne by donations from local residents for the ceremony.
Dressed in wedding dress, the girls playing the ‘groom’ and the ‘bride’ seemed quite excited with the ceremony.
“I am happy today as I’m dressed in bridal finery for the marriage,” said 10-year-old Varsha, the ‘bride’.
The girl performing ‘groom’ in the ceremony also seemed thrilled at the prospect of getting a good husband after performing this ritual.
“Today is my marriage. This is a ritual and we believe that by performing this, we will get good husbands once we grow up,” added Pooja, the ‘groom’.
After the wedding, the mock bride and the groom were taken back to their homes. (ANI)
http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/feature/mock-marriage-held-for-good-husbands-in-orissa_100255751.html
October 3rd, 2009 - 11:01 pm ICT by ANI –
Shampur (Orissa): A mock marriage ceremony meant for seeking good matrimonial alliance was held here on Saturday on the occasion of ‘Kumari Poornima’, an ancient custom of Orissa.
Two underage girls performed bride and groom in the mock wedding ceremony in Shampur village.
Village’s unmarried girls assembled on this occasion to witness the mock marriage as a 10-year-old tied nuptial knot with a seven-year-old here.
The objective of the ceremony is to seek blessings of God for good husbands for all village girls of marriageable age.
“Rituals are like original marriage. Starting from bringing holy water from the seven homes to going to the temple before marriage to take the blessings of God. Everything is done as per the rituals of a Hindu marriage,” said Pushplata Sahoo, a villager.
The ritual is being held for the past 27 years in Shampur, and the expenses are borne by donations from local residents for the ceremony.
Dressed in wedding dress, the girls playing the ‘groom’ and the ‘bride’ seemed quite excited with the ceremony.
“I am happy today as I’m dressed in bridal finery for the marriage,” said 10-year-old Varsha, the ‘bride’.
The girl performing ‘groom’ in the ceremony also seemed thrilled at the prospect of getting a good husband after performing this ritual.
“Today is my marriage. This is a ritual and we believe that by performing this, we will get good husbands once we grow up,” added Pooja, the ‘groom’.
After the wedding, the mock bride and the groom were taken back to their homes. (ANI)
http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/feature/mock-marriage-held-for-good-husbands-in-orissa_100255751.html
Thursday, October 1, 2009
GROWING TOGETHER, BUILDING A MARRIIAGE THAT LASTS
EDINBURG
October 01, 2009 5:14 PM
— An eight-week class titled, “Growing Together, Building a Marriage that Lasts,” is being offered at First Lutheran Church.
These sessions will cover topics including,
Looking at Your Spouse in Reality;
Forgiveness in the Marriage Relationship;
Building Trust;
Sharing the Work of Marriage;
Talking and Listening;
Physical Intimacy;
Avoiding Adultery,
and Assessing Your Marriage.
The first session will take place on Oct. 11 from 5-7 p.m. in the Fellowship Hall.
The remaining sessions will be held on Wednesday evenings from 6:45 to 8 p.m.
Couples of all ages are welcome to attend.
To register, call the church office at (956) 383-2647. First Lutheran Church is located at 302 S. Sugar, one block south of University.
http://www.themonitor.com/news/edinburg-31215-notes-religion.html?orderby=TimeStampDescending&oncommentsPage=1#slComments
October 01, 2009 5:14 PM
— An eight-week class titled, “Growing Together, Building a Marriage that Lasts,” is being offered at First Lutheran Church.
These sessions will cover topics including,
Looking at Your Spouse in Reality;
Forgiveness in the Marriage Relationship;
Building Trust;
Sharing the Work of Marriage;
Talking and Listening;
Physical Intimacy;
Avoiding Adultery,
and Assessing Your Marriage.
The first session will take place on Oct. 11 from 5-7 p.m. in the Fellowship Hall.
The remaining sessions will be held on Wednesday evenings from 6:45 to 8 p.m.
Couples of all ages are welcome to attend.
To register, call the church office at (956) 383-2647. First Lutheran Church is located at 302 S. Sugar, one block south of University.
http://www.themonitor.com/news/edinburg-31215-notes-religion.html?orderby=TimeStampDescending&oncommentsPage=1#slComments
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Why we believe in astrology?
Why we believe in astrology?
Sunita Chabra
20 September 2009, 12:00am IST
It’s good to ask this question. Pythagoras, the famous mathematician, gave us numerology. John Kepler, the great astronomer and mathematician, also made many discoveries in astrology and said: “A most unfailing experience of the excitement of sub-lunar natures by the conjunctions and aspects of the planets has instructed and compelled my unwilling belief.” Can these great mathematicians and astronomers be wrong in one belief and right in another? Extract something positive from astrology if you have a belief and if not, do research before you decide to reject it.
Astrology is the science of stars, and is based on the belief that the position of the planets and stars in the sky influences human life. Like in any other profession, the accuracy of the task depends on the person performing it. The failure of predictions could be because they are wrongly interpreted by astrologers, or incomplete and wrong birth information (date and time) given. After all, predictions are based on mathematical calculations of transiting planets.
Is the daily horoscope equally true for everybody of that sun sign?
It’s generally true, but for an accurate picture, here's what you should do. If you're aware of your ascendant (lagna), read that along with your sun sign. This means that if your sun sign is Libra and your ascendant is Cancer, read the forecast for both.
How can the lines on our palm predict the future?
The lines on our palm are the imprint of our destiny as charted by our past and present karma. If one wants happiness and prosperity, one must do good to others. By deceiving others, we only hurt ourselves. I can say with great conviction that these lines consistently reveal the truth. I have a science background and it was palmistry and its accurate predictions that made me explore the occult sciences. For instance, a break in the fate line signifies a career setback and this can be tested on any hand. The main lines on a palm don't change, from the time we're born, but God does give us choices on the crossroads of life. For example, our words and actions have huge power. Kind words bring positive reactions from the universe but harsh and cruel words bring sorrow. Astrology or palmistry is based on the law of karma. Perhaps, that’s why God has written our destiny in our palm — the instrument of karma.
How can planetary positions and energies affect our lives?
There is an amazing synchronisation in this universe. Everything is perfectly timed, but due to our karmic amnesia, our conscious minds are not aware of it. For instance, the death of Andhra Pradesh chief minister YSR Reddy comes during a time when inimical planets Sun and Saturn are at loggerheads. This period has claimed several luminaries in the past, like India’s first prime minister Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru in May, 1964 and prime ministers Indira Gandhi and Lal Bahadur Shastri in October, 1984 and January, 1966 respectively. While God has given us the power to improve upon our destiny, it’s the master plan that inspires life events. It is possible to change the course of destiny, but only through our karmas. Astrology is based on the principle of karma. Probably that is why the path of good karma is more difficult to follow!
Does the time you are born affect your destiny? Why are the lives of two people born at the same time not similar?
The planetary positions at the time of birth lay our destiny path, where and when we are likely to meet challenges, joys and happiness. Our birth time is actually the starting time of our journey on this earth, and is therefore important. The time of events (mahuratha) for the start of a journey, marriage, change of house or even a launch of a satellite becomes the ‘birth time’ of that event. Planetary positions at the time of birth will reflect its course, progress, success or failure. Even Ved Vyas, the author of the ancient Vedas, was born at a time predetermined as auspicious by his father, the sage Parashar. However, even twins don’t have identical lives, simply because no two people have the same lines on their palms.
Are there some astrology streams that are more effective than others?
All astrological streams are self-sufficient and complete. Being older than history, astrology has suffered repeated attacks. Some ancient scriptures have been destroyed or taken away by invaders, but it is for the new generation of astrologers to try and fill these gaps.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/spirituality/self-help/Why-we-believe-in-astrology/articleshow/5022494.cms
Sunita Chabra
20 September 2009, 12:00am IST
It’s good to ask this question. Pythagoras, the famous mathematician, gave us numerology. John Kepler, the great astronomer and mathematician, also made many discoveries in astrology and said: “A most unfailing experience of the excitement of sub-lunar natures by the conjunctions and aspects of the planets has instructed and compelled my unwilling belief.” Can these great mathematicians and astronomers be wrong in one belief and right in another? Extract something positive from astrology if you have a belief and if not, do research before you decide to reject it.
Astrology is the science of stars, and is based on the belief that the position of the planets and stars in the sky influences human life. Like in any other profession, the accuracy of the task depends on the person performing it. The failure of predictions could be because they are wrongly interpreted by astrologers, or incomplete and wrong birth information (date and time) given. After all, predictions are based on mathematical calculations of transiting planets.
Is the daily horoscope equally true for everybody of that sun sign?
It’s generally true, but for an accurate picture, here's what you should do. If you're aware of your ascendant (lagna), read that along with your sun sign. This means that if your sun sign is Libra and your ascendant is Cancer, read the forecast for both.
How can the lines on our palm predict the future?
The lines on our palm are the imprint of our destiny as charted by our past and present karma. If one wants happiness and prosperity, one must do good to others. By deceiving others, we only hurt ourselves. I can say with great conviction that these lines consistently reveal the truth. I have a science background and it was palmistry and its accurate predictions that made me explore the occult sciences. For instance, a break in the fate line signifies a career setback and this can be tested on any hand. The main lines on a palm don't change, from the time we're born, but God does give us choices on the crossroads of life. For example, our words and actions have huge power. Kind words bring positive reactions from the universe but harsh and cruel words bring sorrow. Astrology or palmistry is based on the law of karma. Perhaps, that’s why God has written our destiny in our palm — the instrument of karma.
How can planetary positions and energies affect our lives?
There is an amazing synchronisation in this universe. Everything is perfectly timed, but due to our karmic amnesia, our conscious minds are not aware of it. For instance, the death of Andhra Pradesh chief minister YSR Reddy comes during a time when inimical planets Sun and Saturn are at loggerheads. This period has claimed several luminaries in the past, like India’s first prime minister Pandit Jawaharlal Nehru in May, 1964 and prime ministers Indira Gandhi and Lal Bahadur Shastri in October, 1984 and January, 1966 respectively. While God has given us the power to improve upon our destiny, it’s the master plan that inspires life events. It is possible to change the course of destiny, but only through our karmas. Astrology is based on the principle of karma. Probably that is why the path of good karma is more difficult to follow!
Does the time you are born affect your destiny? Why are the lives of two people born at the same time not similar?
The planetary positions at the time of birth lay our destiny path, where and when we are likely to meet challenges, joys and happiness. Our birth time is actually the starting time of our journey on this earth, and is therefore important. The time of events (mahuratha) for the start of a journey, marriage, change of house or even a launch of a satellite becomes the ‘birth time’ of that event. Planetary positions at the time of birth will reflect its course, progress, success or failure. Even Ved Vyas, the author of the ancient Vedas, was born at a time predetermined as auspicious by his father, the sage Parashar. However, even twins don’t have identical lives, simply because no two people have the same lines on their palms.
Are there some astrology streams that are more effective than others?
All astrological streams are self-sufficient and complete. Being older than history, astrology has suffered repeated attacks. Some ancient scriptures have been destroyed or taken away by invaders, but it is for the new generation of astrologers to try and fill these gaps.
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/life-style/spirituality/self-help/Why-we-believe-in-astrology/articleshow/5022494.cms
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Tying knot? Your wedding budget just rose by 25%
Tying knot? Your wedding budget just rose by 25%
8 Sep 2009, 1147 hrs IST,
8 Sep 2009, 1147 hrs IST,
Yashpal Parmar , ET Bureau
AHMEDABAD: Wedding costs are likely to rise by 20-25 % due to availability of fewer auspicious marriage dates this season. As per the Hindu calendar (Vikram Samvant), the November-February marriage season has only 24 auspicious days, down from last year’s 50.
The available days, shrunk by 50%, is expected to put pressure on venues , marriage materials, caterers, decorators-florists , trousseau, jewellry and logistics et al, leading to a rise in the input costs for the great Indian weddings . Last year, slump in the economy saw the business drop by 25%.
Companies in the business of managing plush weddings in India and abroad, an organised business worth Rs 5,000 crore about a fourth of the total Rs 20,000-crore Indian wedding market, are already witnessing rush from the clients. So much so that bigger planners are outsourcing part of their work to smaller agencies. A Mumbai-based event management company has hired an Indore-based wedding planner for a destination wedding in Goa.
Says Percept D’Mark’s wedding section head Aditya Motwani: “Wedding planners will have to deliver more on fewer days. There is a rush of clients as more marriages are being held on the same day. Delhi will see 5,000 weddings on November 28. The bookings now face a 20-25 % rise in costs as supplies are under pressure for the November-December-January peak season.”
While planners have charged normal rates for weddings already booked, for those who finalised the dates late, the professional help will come at a premium.
AHMEDABAD: Wedding costs are likely to rise by 20-25 % due to availability of fewer auspicious marriage dates this season. As per the Hindu calendar (Vikram Samvant), the November-February marriage season has only 24 auspicious days, down from last year’s 50.
The available days, shrunk by 50%, is expected to put pressure on venues , marriage materials, caterers, decorators-florists , trousseau, jewellry and logistics et al, leading to a rise in the input costs for the great Indian weddings . Last year, slump in the economy saw the business drop by 25%.
Companies in the business of managing plush weddings in India and abroad, an organised business worth Rs 5,000 crore about a fourth of the total Rs 20,000-crore Indian wedding market, are already witnessing rush from the clients. So much so that bigger planners are outsourcing part of their work to smaller agencies. A Mumbai-based event management company has hired an Indore-based wedding planner for a destination wedding in Goa.
Says Percept D’Mark’s wedding section head Aditya Motwani: “Wedding planners will have to deliver more on fewer days. There is a rush of clients as more marriages are being held on the same day. Delhi will see 5,000 weddings on November 28. The bookings now face a 20-25 % rise in costs as supplies are under pressure for the November-December-January peak season.”
While planners have charged normal rates for weddings already booked, for those who finalised the dates late, the professional help will come at a premium.
Says Ahmedabad-based Red Events director Saurabh Agrawal: “Families hosting a wedding this season will have to cough up more. The weddings business is seasonal and with more number of families placing orders on the same day, marriage hall owners, caterers, florists, decorators, videographers, fashion designers, publishers of wedding cards etc will make the most of this rush by jacking up prices.” Last season, wedding organisers witnessed a 25% slump in the business due to economic slowdown. But this season it is expected to make amends, Mr Agrawal added.
“The main constituents that will see a marked rise in prices will be venues, flowers, and decorators. Flower prices are twice higher than what we paid last season. A few marriages have now being scheduled on civic body grounds as there are no venues available,” said Abhinav Hemjain, director of Indore-based V 4 Plus Media Events and Entertainment.
http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/News/News-By-Industry/ET-Cetera/Tying-knot-Your-wedding-budget-just-rose-by-25-/articleshow/4985263.cms
Waterloo couple get married twice in one day
Waterloo couple get married twice in one day
Sep 10 2009
Sep 10 2009
by Lyndsay Young, Crosby Herald
Waterloo couple get married twice in one day
A BRIDE and groom had a double wedding celebration by getting married twice in one day.
Samantha Swift and her bridegroom Hinay Lad had a traditional Christian wedding followed by a Hindu ceremony.
The couple had a Nuptial Mass at St Thomas’ of Canterbury RC Church in Great George’s Road at 1.30pm followed by the Hindu ceremony at 4pm at Waterloo’s Old Christ Church.
Samantha, who grew up in Thornton and is a former pupil of Holy Family High School, met Hinay when they were both studying in Manchester. She was studying at Manchester Met College and Hinay at the University of Manchester.
They are both teachers of design and technology at Manchester schools.
It was another chapter in the history of Old Christ Church as it hosted its first Hindu wedding.
The Indian ceremony started on the Thursday with blessings at the Warrington home of Hinay’s parents, Haribhai and Vihna Lad. It resumed on the Saturday with the ceremonies in Waterloo.
More than 200 guests and well-wishers attended the ceremony at St Thomas’ Church and the mass was celebrated by Fr John Cullen.
The Hindu ceremony lasted more than two and half hours and was conducted by Dilip Trivedi.
lDO you have a wedding story to tell? E-mail us at: newsdesk@crosbyherald.co.uk or call 01704 536655.
Wedding pictures will be published free of charge, please include a contact name and phone number with any submitted.
http://www.crosbyherald.co.uk/news/crosby-news/2009/09/10/waterloo-couple-get-married-twice-in-one-day-68459-24649868/
Waterloo couple get married twice in one day
A BRIDE and groom had a double wedding celebration by getting married twice in one day.
Samantha Swift and her bridegroom Hinay Lad had a traditional Christian wedding followed by a Hindu ceremony.
The couple had a Nuptial Mass at St Thomas’ of Canterbury RC Church in Great George’s Road at 1.30pm followed by the Hindu ceremony at 4pm at Waterloo’s Old Christ Church.
Samantha, who grew up in Thornton and is a former pupil of Holy Family High School, met Hinay when they were both studying in Manchester. She was studying at Manchester Met College and Hinay at the University of Manchester.
They are both teachers of design and technology at Manchester schools.
It was another chapter in the history of Old Christ Church as it hosted its first Hindu wedding.
The Indian ceremony started on the Thursday with blessings at the Warrington home of Hinay’s parents, Haribhai and Vihna Lad. It resumed on the Saturday with the ceremonies in Waterloo.
More than 200 guests and well-wishers attended the ceremony at St Thomas’ Church and the mass was celebrated by Fr John Cullen.
The Hindu ceremony lasted more than two and half hours and was conducted by Dilip Trivedi.
lDO you have a wedding story to tell? E-mail us at: newsdesk@crosbyherald.co.uk or call 01704 536655.
Wedding pictures will be published free of charge, please include a contact name and phone number with any submitted.
http://www.crosbyherald.co.uk/news/crosby-news/2009/09/10/waterloo-couple-get-married-twice-in-one-day-68459-24649868/
Sunday, July 26, 2009
You are invited to my big, fat Indian wedding
You are invited to my big, fat Indian wedding
The nofrills Indian nuptial ceremony has become a relic of the past as more brides and grooms splurge copious amounts of money on lavish, dream weddings.
Tough economic times may have resulted in slightly trimmer guest lists, but there’s been little sparing of costs on wedding garb, jewellery, venues, decor, invitations, photography and, most importantly, food.
Prenuptial festivities, too, have become extravagant affairs. Gone are the days of family and friends gathering at the homes of the bride and groom for the traditional meal, music, dance and wedding rituals.
These days bridal couples are opting for fancy venues — from deckedout halls to restaurants — to host their guests before the big day.
Wellknown Durban set designer Koogan Pillay said Indian weddings had become more elaborate.
“More and more people are going for small numbers and attention to detail from the appointment of tables to the dinner service and napkins.
“In the old days, it was paper napkins. Now it’s the starched type. The younger generation are well researched on international weddings, right down to the type of cutlery.”
Pillay, whose signature sets include giant stonelike Hindu deities, said some people spent up to a R1million on prewedding and wedding festivities.
“We have reached Bollywood proportions, if not more, by our standards,” he said.
Pillay, who has been in the industry for 28 years, said it was concerning that, despite the recession, some people were still splurging on weddings.
“Wanting to be better or keeping up with the Joneses is a thing of the past. Now it is what people specifically want and their tastes.
“Weddings have evolved into big social events. Traditional ceremonies are now being followed by a reception, where extended family and friends have a big party,” he said.
He said weddings had become stage productions because of the venues which lent themselves to a theatrical setting.
“My passion for theatre is coming through in weddings with a theatrical feel. We are trying to make weddings more interactive. It’s an experience that should tickle all the senses. There is also the use of pyrotechnics.
“I try to remind clients that the wedding is a religious ceremony and that spiritual ambience has to be created,” he said.
A new trend of garden weddings also seems to be becoming popular with Indian bridal couples, with white marquees for receptions being transformed into fairylands with lighting, drapes and airconditioning.
One such recent garden wedding, at Durban’s Botanic Gardens, was a lavish affair with a beautifully decorated area for a Johannesburg bride, the daughter of a wealthy Durban businessman, and her groom set up in the pond.
It also featured stunning lifesize stone deities illuminated with soft lighting, a giant marquee complete with a big screen for more than 500 guests to view the nuptials and a fairylight draped white dining tent.
Bridgette Bester, sales and events coordinator for Liquid Chefs, a mobile bar service, said they had set up six bar stations at different spots, serving alcoholic and nonalcoholic cocktails for the wedding.
“There were 750 guests, which was a wedding to remember. The interest in having mobile bars at weddings has broadened. We are getting more Hindus asking us for quotes, ” said Bester.
A Reservoir Hills businessman, Sanjith Dukhi, whose daughter, Anusha, recently married Mukesh Mittal, said people were willing to splurge on weddings.
Dukhi said his daughter’s prewedding festivities took place at Kashmir Restaurant in Umhlanga and Sibaya Casino and Entertainment Kingdom, respectively, followed by the wedding ceremony at the Hilton Hotel. The Mittals, who are both actuaries, live in Hong Kong.
“Although the size of weddings have become more intimate, the wedding celebrations have become very expensive.
“No matter how many guests, the venue, food, decor, clothing and jewellery still costs a lot. People are moving away from the home scene to venues, where you can create an atmosphere with the decor and you have more space to dance, ” said Dukhi.
In February, Durban actress and model Tarina Patel tied the knot with Iqbal Meer Sharma, the deputy director general in the Department of Trade and Industry, in an elaborate fairytale affair at Pinnacle Point Beach and Golf Resort.
The couple, who had Islamic and Hindu ceremonies, had the set of a Rajasthan palace built in India, shipped to South Africa, and set up at the venue. They also flew in two Indian chefs and a DJ. Patel said she had replicated one of the world’s top Indian weddings.
Durban model Kamisha Nanhoo, who recently married Sudir Maharaj in the Kendra Hall, said couples these days were opting for ultramodern and glamorous weddings. “We chose ours to be simple and traditional. The stage setting was the replica of a temple,” she said.
TELL US: What do you think about opulent weddings in today’s economic climate? Email your responses to kznextra@sundaytimes.co.za before 11am on Wednesday, July 29.
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